I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You are the jesus of drinking
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
