I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
