That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
