Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
