so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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