But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
