You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
