This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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