I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Randomize
