Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
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