okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
you will always have a special place in my vag
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
