69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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