He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize