im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Just pee around me
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
