Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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