She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
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