my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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