I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Randomize
