I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
