pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize