A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
