I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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