More tranny stories later!
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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