It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
