Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
