I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
