the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
