This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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