You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
