Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
But break dance skills will only take you so far
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize
