You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
