I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
