Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
