if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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