i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I just want to make out with him forever
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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