I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
