Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
