I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
that is very illegal...i love you.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
