Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
