Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
my being single is dangerous.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
