no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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