Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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