Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
