Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
