I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
