girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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