this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize