i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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