that's an acceptable place to lick
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
How naked do you want me to be?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize