It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
