So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
